It all comes down to choices

I recently read an article by Knight Kiplinger of Kiplinger’s magazine. Kiplinger wrote:

“Sure, I yearn for some aspects of the America of my boyhood, the 1950s, when there was better social order and respect for authority, fewer divorces (underline added by me) and no public vulgarity in popular culture.”

He goes on to say:

“But that was also an era in which a higher proportion of Americans lived in poverty, air and water pollution was far worse, fewer young people could go to college, the average standard of living was much lower, and discrimination against women and racial minorities was rampant – and legal – in all aspects of American life.”

Relating Kiplinger’s words to my profession, it makes me wonder if our society was destined to have an increase in divorces as a natural result of the advances Kiplinger lists (and others he doesn’t list). Is it better to “stick out” a “bad” marriage, or is that also 1950s thinking that has gone the way of poverty, pollution, and discrimination as described by Kiplinger?

This is a question that has to be answered by each of us as individuals. However, I feel strongly that today’s opportunities don’t have to mean a complete absence of yesterday’s order and simplicity.

Improved technology doesn’t mean we have to lose personal contact. Increased income and education doesn’t mean we have to lose respect for others. An increase in divorces doesn’t mean we have to allow conflict and anger to consume our families.

It all comes down to choices.

We have the ability to choose to maintain personal contact, to maintain respect for others, and to maintain cooperativeness and civility in divorces.

Divorces are a regular part of today’s society. Conflict, anger, and violence don’t have to be. The choice is ours.